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How to Be the Man You’ve Always Wanted To Be by Letting Go of Perfection


Ever wonder what makes superheroes so strong and powerful? It’s more than their sheer physical strength, speed, and innate knowledge of machinery.

When you think about it, what truly makes superheroes so special are their backstories. Superheroes have good intentions. Superheroes work tirelessly to overcome obstacles to fight for good. But, notice that it’s not perfection that makes these superheroes amazing.

A brilliant billionaire, Tony Stark, builds high-tech suits of armor and finds himself facing limitations, like relationship challenges or fighting off enemies, like The Mandarin or Fin Fang Foom, who know his weaknesses and try to outsmart him.

Superman doesn’t stand a chance against Kryptonite, and depending on the color of the space rock, he can permanently lose his strength and superpowers.

Spiderman can shoot webs and consistently be able to save the day, but he still faces a host of personal issues.

We are magnetized towards superheroes because they represent the boundless power we wish we had – to solve large problems, to help others in greater ways, to be capable of enough strength to overcome struggles and enemies, alike.

When you think about the man you’ve always wanted to be, realize that this tendency to be drawn towards characters who stand for freedom and justice represent the instinctual ability of each and every one of us, as humans, to strive for self-development and self-improvement. They are the versions of us that are able to surmount the obstacles that impede our path to attain the best versions of ourselves.

And, let’s get this straight – they are not perfect. Neither are we.
To do great things in the world, you do not need to be perfect.

Here are 5 ways you can quit obsessing about becoming perfect. Instead, focus on becoming the man you want to be.

1.   Slow Down

When was the last time you’ve taken a moment to step back to collect your thoughts, find calmness amongst the chaos, and cope with your stress? Slowing down gives you time to better understand present self and your reactions so you can make better decisions. Take a moment to consider what matters to you. We’re always changing. Our priorities shift over time. Give attention to envisioning what you want to accomplish, along with where you’re falling short. Being mindful where you are in your journey will give you the motivation to enjoy what’s going well.

2.   Keep Perspective

Flex your muscles to figure out how you fit into the bigger picture. Maybe you’re noticing you’d like to do more when it comes to your family or career? Maybe you’re pushing yourself to be more spiritual, fit, or social?  Keeping your eye on perfection may actually be what’s holding you back. Consider what’s happening around you and how you’re capable of making a difference. While it may be uncomfortable, are there any large leaps or changes you can make to take you where you’d like to be?

3.   Be the Ball

This is my favorite piece of advice from my own dad. Like a skier at the top of the mountain, before you’re about to head down, plan your path, take note of areas you want to avoid, and determine where and how you’ll bounce. This is called “being the ball.” What can you leverage to take you where you want to be? Where can you pick up speed? Where can you jump? Where can you rest? Don’t focus so much on perfection that you’re not enjoying the flow of the trail. You’re more than able to adjust as you go.

4. Create Space to Thrive

Establishing boundaries will give you time and space to improve. But, the problem with boundaries is the expectations involved and how they match our daily lives. Think about what are your non-negotiables are when it comes to retaining your self-discipline and what you need in order to keep momentum. While you’re working on improving one area of your life, situations will often come up that will compete for your attention. Strive for continued improvement, but stay balanced. Filter out what feels like more of an obligation in order to stay your course and avoid getting side-tracked. Balance over perfection leads to contentment.

5. Be Grateful

Perfection is an illusion and ever-changing. Your vision of perfection won’t look the same tomorrow, so it’s important to become comfortable with the transitory nature of perfection if you want to have peace of mind. Think about the bigger picture, people and opportunities along the way that help you in your path to improvement. You’re developing your story. You’re striving for more. You showing yourself and others you care. And, you’ll find what matters. Your intentions are good. And, there’s much to be thankful for.

It’s not necessary to hold yourself to the highest standards of perfection. What enables us to connect with others are actually our imperfections and our storylines. By rising to the occasion, demonstrating what you stand for, showing good intentions, and caring about others, you’ll find that people are more likely to relate to you and support you in what you’re looking to achieve.

After all, what is a hero other than someone who is pushing past limitations to bring a sense of greater good?

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